The Prison Of Man – 1000 Different Faces (Why You Self Sabotage)
Before we get into this deep dive, I just wanted to let you know that Cohort #4 of Clean Your Inner World is now open and closes this Sunday at 11:59 pm EST, so if you want to rewire your brain in 45 days and unlock quantum breakthroughs in the world of business ($$$ wise), then check this out and grab your seat.
Inside this deep dive, I want to share with you one of the biggest discoveries I’ve made that may be holding you back…
… without you even realizing it.
This is TRULY epic, so let’s jump right in.
I don’t know if you noticed, but man wears 1000 different faces and it’s these faces that limit his success, relationships, and ability to actualize his true potential.
What the hell are you talking about, Tej?
Well, let me ask you:
"How many people do you have living inside you?"
Let me rephrase…
"How many different images/personalities do you have running the show inside you?"
You may not realize it (I didn’t for a long time), but if you simply become aware of yourself you’ll realize you’re run by many different faces/personalities/images throughout the day.
For example, let’s say you set the aim to start waking up at 5:00 AM and you’re so jacked and excited. The possibilities it will open up for you. The life it will give rise to. OMFG it’s all so epic and exciting and this part of you loves it so much that it can hardly even sleep. Then what happens when the alarm goes off at 5:00 AM in the morning? Is that part of you that was so excited and jacked up still there or has he been replaced with another personality? Well, if you’re like most you’ll probably find a new personality inside you running the show.
One that is lazy, comfortable, and doesn’t want to get out of bed.
All of a sudden all that excitement is nowhere to be found and you even think to yourself that this is absolutely crazy… Why on earth would anybody want to get up at 5:00 AM (just an example).
Ever noticed that?
This is why they say the person who sets the alarm to wake up at 5:00 AM and the person who wakes up to the alarm are two different people (lol).
But that’s just one example.
Let’s keep it moving…
Have you ever been so sick and tired of your life that you’re willing to do whatever it takes to get your shit together? To the point where you’re completely fed up, fuming with anger, and want to come up with all these habits and routines you can follow to become a total beast?
Maybe you have. Maybe you haven’t.
But me personally, I remember once I was in this state and was like enough is enough… It's time to do 75HARD.
And I did.
But as I was doing it, I noticed something interesting… I noticed another personality/image started rearing its ugly head half way through and telling me "Oh you get the jist of it now… you can stop."
This part of me didn’t like 75HARD.
So naturally it wanted to sabotage my progress.
Can you relate?
Now let’s see how this plays out in our relationships…
Let’s say you’ve been dating a girl for a while and you’re in love with her. You want to build a life together, you know how it goes.
So you decide to get married.
Then you get married and during your marriage another image inside gets triggered a year or so into it and starts feeling trapped, confined, and wants to be wild and free.
All of a sudden you now feel like you want a divorce (and in most cases you may actually follow through and proceed).
Can you see this?
Man is RUN by all the different images/personalities that exist inside him (where these images come from is a topic for another discussion, not interested in that here but boy does the rabbit hole go deep!)...
… and it’s the identification with THESE that sabotages your potential and limits what you can do in life.
For we’re constantly shifting through different images based on whatever situation we find ourselves in and it happens AUTOMATICALLY (i.e. you’re feeling amazing and fired up to live life then you come downstairs, Mom says something to you, all of a sudden you get triggered, and now the 5-year old you/image is running the show and you lash out and say something in return. All of a sudden those good feelings, that high energy, positivity is all gone. WTF happened? Well you were x way and then based on a trigger in your environment, an image inside you came out to run the show/takeover).
(Worst of all? We think we are the images that come up and as a result make CRITICAL LIFE DECISIONS based on what images come up / what they tell us to do.)
This is one reason why people act differently around different people because different people/environments call out different images in us and that’s who we are a slave to (because again we actually think with every fiber of our being that we are these images).
Can you see how dangerous this is?
We are run by images/personalities, nobody is home.
The real part of us wants to build a business to express its inherent value/serve. An image inside wants to be comfortable and lazy and have the world take care of him.
In the beginning, we identify with the real and shit is all good, we’re rockin’ and rollin’.
Then we hit a roadblock and the second image gets triggered in us and it’s who comes out to play.
All of a sudden we’re now fed up with everything, life loses its color, and we’re like F business, it’s too hard blah blah.
A real part of us wants to get in shape/take care of our health because it’s an expression of love for ourselves. An image wants to give into pleasure and instant gratification.
In the beginning, we identify with the real and shit is good, we’re hitting our workouts and sticking to our diet.
Then we get tempted with a cookie and the salivating pleasure seeking image inside us comes out to play and all of a sudden we’re chowing down the cake, sabotaging our diet, and ruining our health.
A real part of us wants to give up alcohol because we notice it dims our true authenticity. An image wants to act fake and let loose.
In the beginning, we identify with the real and try to control our drinking or quit cold turkey and we’re sticking to our sober streak and life is good.
Then one of our buddies texts us: "BRO, I’M THROWING A SICK HALLOWEEEN RAGER THIS WEEKEND, YOU DOWN?" and all of a sudden the image inside you that loves to party hard, let loose, and be a complete savage comes out to play and you find it starts calling the shots.
Next thing you know… you’re slamming bottles of Goose, jumping on tables, and screaming at the top of your lungs.
(Some people unfortunately even become murderers because they get overtaken by an image and everything just goes black, next thing they know they have killed someone. Insane.)
Yep and again we hardly ever realize this.
We truly believe we are the images that are arising and think listening to these images/following what they are telling us is actually being TRUE to ourselves (again, pure insanity!).
Yet that’s not all.
Something interesting also happens when/if we decide we want to become successful.
Let me explain…
When a man (or woman) decides he wants to become successful (rich/wealthy/whatever), what does he do?
He creates an image of who he needs to become and starts to suppress all the other qualities that are inside him.
For example: He’ll suppress the real fun part of himself, the part of him that loves to laugh/crack jokes/play, the part of him that likes to take it easy/enjoy simpler things.
Instead: He’ll DOUBLE DOWN on the image that he believes he needs to feed/become in order to succeed. As a result: He is FEEDING only one image inside him (the boring, serious professional aka who he thinks he needs to be to succeed) and neglecting all the other qualities that make him up.
So over time he may make his life a living hell and succeed on a limited scale, but in the process he typically ends up becoming a COMPLETE SQUARE (devoid of all LIFE).
Now he has everything, but no capacity to enjoy any of it because he suppressed his true desires to have fun/express himself in other ways/be free to enjoy life, etc.
Go figure, right?
Yep, but where it also gets really scary is in the process he tends to suppress ‘negative’ images too. But the thing is, you can’t keep your inner images/demons away from the light for long because the more you do, the more power you’re actually giving them.
So what ends up happening one day is all those images are so tired of being ignored and suppressed that something in the environment triggers one of them to come out and when it comes out it causes a COMPLETE MESS in your life/sabotages all your hard work.
I’ve seen it time and time again.
And that’s not even the worst part.
Worst part is the actual act of suppression is using up so much of your energy that you’re constantly manipulating and micro-managing yourself from the inside out - resulting in a life that is a complete shit show (giving rise to feelings of being tired all the time and like you have to constantly stay on top of the inner micro-managing or else something is going to come up).
Not a fun way to live life, is it?
OF COURSE NOOOOOOOOT!
Being run by images, self-sabotaging ourselves, getting on and off the wagon, turning into squares, feeling guilt from betraying ourselves (when we return back to the real us), having our businesses, relationships, lives fall apart all because of these inner images is the most saddest thing in the world.
And yet this is how we live our lives!
Who we truly are is rarely living our life.
Instead, images are living our life…
… and we’re always at the mercy of these images.
(Interesting way I like to look at it: Every time you’re not present, an image is running/living your life for you.)
PUREEEEEE INSANITY IF YOU ASK ME (and I can say that because that’s how I’ve lived my life! Completely at the mercy of all these different images, living like a slave. Taking each image to be who I am and basing CRITICAL DECISIONS in my health, business, relationships off these images.)
So what’s the solution, Tej?
Well, the first step of the solution is you need to become aware of what is happening. Chances are up till now (to no fault of your own) you’ve been asleep at the wheel and letting these images run your life for you.
A happens, x image comes out and runs your life. B happens, y image comes out and runs your life. C happens, z image comes out and runs your life.
(This happens automatically. Become aware of how this is an automatic reaction.)
Can you see how that happens in your life?
Think of examples, make this real. This is not a feel good part of the letter, this is a very serious part (because otherwise you may actually end up going along with these images and deciding who to marry, where to live, what career to get into based on an image that is actually not you).
You must see how you get overtaken by images if you want to be free. This is the first step, so spend time noticing.
Next you want to become aware of your tendency to feed certain images and neglect other images. Self-help industry conditions us to feed the good, suppress the bad. But in the process, we actually unknowingly make the ‘negative’ images stronger because they remain in our unconscious/in the dark, calling the shots.
So notice, notice, notice. Become aware of your conditioned reaction to suppress certain images.
Maybe you suppress the image of yourself that feels weak.
Maybe you suppress the image of yourself that needs Mommy.
Maybe you suppress the image of yourself that feels valueless.
Whatever. Just notice.
Third step after you’ve noticed you’re being run by images and self help conditions you to feed one image and suppress the others is to wake up to the most profound realization of your life.
What’s the realization?
All your life you’ve likely been so zoomed in and a slave to these automatic images (nobody’s judging, I’m in the same boat lol) that you think they are who you are. BUT after you start to notice these images (chances are you didn’t even notice these before because you were fully identified with them) and your habitual reaction to suppress certain and feed others, you start to create more space between you and the images that would normally run your life and that’s when you’ll likely realize:
"Wait a minute, I’m actually NOT these images. I am the Awareness that is aware of these images!"
(This thought/realization itself is arising in the awareness that you are).
It doesn’t matter if the image is good or bad. It is simply arising within your Awareness. Typically, you would lose your Awareness and become identified with the images and let them take you for a ride wherever they wanted to go. Or you would identify with positive images and neglect/suppress negative ones and take that to be who you are. But now you start to realize that none of the images are you because well you’re not an image, are you? You’re an actual, alive, human BEING. The images that arise are simply like clothes our Awareness can dress up in. If it wears a certain piece of clothing for too long, it starts to think that is what you are. Which is, of course, not true.
So the reason I bring all this up is because the ONLY SOLUTION out of our predicament is to realize…
We are not any image. We are the awareness that is aware of the images that arise.
Once we make this realization, we go from being slaves to whatever images arise (living on auto-pilot, being overtaken and run by images by default because nobody is home meaning we’re not aware of our awareness) TO taking back ownership of our Inner Kingdom. The difference between a master and a pupil, you see, is the pupil is being run by images. There’s a thousand different images inside him. One day he’s x way. Another day he’s y way. Another day he’s z way. Whereas the master’s Kingdom is not run by images, but the ONE being that he is: Awareness. The master is the king of his kingdom (as Awareness). The pupil is a slave to himself (at the mercy of his images).
So the only way out of our predicament is by moving away from being at the mercy of all these images and towards ‘Awareness’.
This IMO is what it means to take back your Kingdom and sit on your throne.
This may sound like it’s just an idea, but it’s very practical.
To illustrate, let’s go back to our earlier examples:
If you want to build a business, but find yourself not wanting to do the uncomfortable work, simply remain in touch with your Awareness (what you are) and notice this is just an image arising and passing. It is not you. No need to follow it. Just let it be and it’ll come and go on its own.
If you want to get in shape, but find yourself wanting to sabotage your diet/exercise regimen, simply remain in touch with your Awareness (what you are) and notice this is just an image arising and passing. It is not you. No need to follow it. Just let it be and it’ll come and go on its own.
If you want to give up alcohol, but find yourself tempted to poison yourself, simply remain in touch with your Awareness (what you are) and notice this is just an image arising and passing. It is not you. No need to follow it. Just let it be and it’ll come and go on its own.
Also it’s worth noting that if you want to achieve x and find yourself thinking you have to become z way (a square) to make it happen, simply remain in touch with your Awareness (what you are) and notice this is just an image arising and passing. It is not you. No need to follow it.
Key is to stay in the seat of awareness, not becoming a good image or a bad image (this way you avoid becoming a square and can be more objective. A square will get all his work done and then spend his evening doing more square boy shit like re-reading a self help book he’s already read a gazillion times because he thinks that’s hustling and everybody else is a loser. Somebody rested in the seat of awareness will get their work done and take care of their vessel by maybe hanging out with friends, doing something relaxing, going to a social event, even going to a party, whatever (nobody is saying you can’t have fun). This allows you to live more objectively and give yourself what you need, so you avoid becoming a one-dimensional square).
That’s really it.
Important thing to realize is that what you fundamentally are is the Awareness itself, but all these images arise in you because they want your attention and love (images come from the past). When these images get triggered, they arise and want to be released.
But we tend to cling onto them and become them. All we have to do is allow the images (good or bad) to arise without clinging onto any and we start to clean our inner vessel.
Over time, these images start to fade away and we start to know ourselves as what we fundamentally are:
And with this Awareness, we start to experience all the qualities that give us true fulfillment and our life becomes an expression of what we are and now we no longer live the life of images, but live the life of what we truly are:
… and that’s when we can ACTUALIZE our TRUE potential (because we’re living as what we are instead of images). This is what it means to live the TRUE and FREE life instead of the programmed life and it’s the highest life we can live.
So with all that stated, here’s a quick summary of all this from my personal journal that ties it all together:
This is truly life changing to say the least (and is the REAL cure to lack of discipline, consistency, little-to-no success, etc. Plus it could very well keep you from destroying your life and your relationships).
The most important work you can do IMO.
That’s it for the second edition of the Mindsets Newsletter by mindskool.com. Officially in the books! Did you enjoy this edition? Drop me a reply and let me know?
If you have specific questions or topics you want explored, feel free to also include those in your reply. I’ve got an extensive list of ideas I want to share with you, but always happy to tailor the editions for your most relevant needs.
See you next Wednesday!
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